It's sad to see an icon go bad, but because of a horrible error in latin, instead of being interred in sanctity the pope has risen to become one of the holy undead. The Cardinals responsible for this horrible reversal of X-tian dogma have been eaten. "Old, stringy, and greasy." declared the zombie pontiff, "But the wine was pretty good."
The vatican suffers in terror, and the list of the eaten grows minute by minute, but due to his infalibilty no one is willing to defy the new Zombie Pope. A flood of papal bulls have been streaming from the copy machines of the Vatican PR Office, and Fuggin Hilarious has learned that it is the subject of one of these new reeking documents of the ressurected pontif. It seems we've been excommunicated. But that is the least of the revelations...
The Zombie Pope revealed that this was, indeed, armegeddon, that we lost, and that the Antichrist G.W. Bush had prepared the way for the rapture. Basically, the Undead Pope admitted, the ribald cartoon South Park was the new Bible, and everything that was ever said in South Park episodes was totally the truth. Finally, the pope admitted that the Mormons were actually the only real christians, but the Jehovahs Witnesses were a close second.
New revelations are expected soon.
1 comment:
Yeah, there's a reason that they call it Papal Bull!
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